Existential Blog Questions

I feel very lackluster as of late. I'm not inspired to work on the blog. I have so much content lined up from my trips to the UK in the spring and Newfoundland in the summer, but I just can't bring myself to spend the time and sit down to write the posts, edit the photos or even promote the blog on social media.

Part of the issue is that I've been working the day job quite a bit lately which involves day and evening shifts, sometimes in the same day and its just left me dog-tired. When I do have a bit of free time, I just can't muster the energy to anything but mentally prepare to go back to work.

I'm finding also, and not proudly I might add, I've been having some serious blogger envy, fellow bloggers might know this feeling. You follow some bad-ass bloggers and lady bosses and once in a while you wish it was you that was ruling the internet--taking names and getting shit done. When really you are just sitting in front of your computer with a list of site maintenance to-dos and an armload of articles to read about building your blog/your brand/your numbers, when really all you want to do (and lets be honest, actually do) is watch instagram stories, drink tea, and plan a make believe trip to Bali.

I thoroughly love blogging. I enjoy the writing, taking photos, creating the general content. What I'm wondering now though is, is blogging something I'm content with being a small (very small) side project that I'm purely doing for my own enjoyment and the few followers I do happen to have (I dearly love each of you)? Or do I actually want to grow this somewhat schizophrenic little blog into something that can fulfill me both emotionally and financially?

Do I have a distinct enough voice? Do I even have a voice? What is my niche? Is it unique enough? It is what I want? Is it what you want? Where are my pants?

Am I uninspired because I'm not seeing the results I want or merely because I'm tired and just need a little nap?

So many questions, fellow bloggers have you had these kinds of feelings? I'm not ready to quit you, {Erin Out and About}, but how do I get inspired again?

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On the Road Again

For a few upcoming weeks, my company has shut down completely. No one is allowed on the premises, meaning I suddenly have some free time. A co-worker asked me what my plans were for the forced down time and I responded 'Sleep.' After she chastised me for being too young to require that much sleep (love her!) she told me of her plans to travel to Iceland.

And that's all it took.

That tiny suggestion of travel and I couldn't satisfy the itch until I too booked a flight.

Between work and other general life challenges I have barely had time to plan anything, which has stressed me out slightly. Even more so since I'm usually the rock up and travel buddy, jumping on to the hard work of others' planned trips or as a kind friend described me, 'a travel leech'. I haven't prepared myself for all the work that goes behind planning a trip. Ugh! Where am I going to stay and when? How am I getting there? What am I going to do while there? Such an effort! I should just stay home....I kid, I kid. But it seriously is hard. I started out with one itinerary at the beginning of the planning stage and ending with something completely different. Even leaving a part of it completely open for spontaneity. That's just how I roll.

So expect some radio silence on this blog for the next few weeks as I didn't manage to schedule any posts (same reason as above. TLDR: It's hard work!).

I'll be returning in April with more South America posts (it's the trip that keeps on giving), some hometown tourist items from Toronto the Good, and obviously lots more to come of my latest adventure!

I'll be spending some time in Ireland, Scotland, London, the Lake District, and I have a long layover in Amsterdam. If you have any recommendations or travel tips, please do share them with me in the comments or if your interested in meeting up old school and by old school I mean IRL then email me!

I will miss you my lovelies. Catchya on the flip side!

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Birthday Debrief

Today, at 11:08 am EDT, I turn 34. 

Unlike when I turned 32, I don't have as many feels about it this time around. 

Now that I'm well into my 30s I find myself to be in the midst of my 'third life crisis'--I mean, am I where I'm supposed to be? Should I own a house already? Be married with kid(s)? Have a job, earning lots of money? 

Most days I feel like I'm just coping with things. This #adulting thing is harder than they lead you to believe.

Sometimes as things get to be too much, I take a deep breath and count the blessings I do have and reckon that life will get figured out eventually. Until that time, I will continue to enjoy travelling, the job I do have and being a hometown tourist with friends. 

Happy Birthday to me!

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"Travel" Blogger Problems: Monthly Link Up

This month's travel link up theme is all about the woes of a travel blogger.

My "travel" blogger problem is just that, the travel part. Since being an expat returned home, I don't think I still fit into the genre of 'travel blogger'. But really I wonder, did I ever really fit into it?

Sure, I travelled. Sure, I blogged. But did that make me a travel blogger?

Really what I enjoy doing most while travelling, living abroad or settled at home, is stuff and things; arts and culture; food and drink; being in and around town; and then writing about it here. My life was in a rut pre-moving to London, the fixed expiry of my time there got me out enjoying every last second I had. Once back in Canada I wanted to continue living the expat lifestyle and not get back in that rut (no more panic moves to London left in me).

Nowadays, I call myself a hometown tourist, doing all the things I can find (what up Taco Fest!), and trying to find a local blogger community to engage with (where my Toronto Bloggers at?!)


I may not know what kind of blogger I am anymore (or ever was for that matter), but I'm going to keep doing me and hopefully people (other than just those that I call mum--HI MOM!) enjoy my ramblings as much as I like making them.

At the beginning of each month, I like to take part in the monthly travel link up hosted on the incredible blogs hosted by Angie, Jessi, Emma,  and this month's special host Lauren. You can join in too by leaving a comment below, checking out other posts on the link up, or adding your own post to the widget now until May 7th.

Don't miss a post! 

Sign up for email posts (found on the sidebar), like my facebook page, or follow me on bloglovin'. You can also keep up with my instagram feed and I occasionally tweet.

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Hi, my name is Erin and I just might have a blogging addiction

I don't have a blogging addiction. I don't.  

I will admit, however that for awhile now I've been obsessed with photographing mealtime plates before I'd dare lift a fork and knife and obviously one must chase those instagrammable moments (remember when the phenomenon was called a Kodak Moments?).

But that's not a blogging addiction.

I confess that lately, I can't stop scrolling through my Bloglovin' feed (cheeky plug: you can follow me here), adding new blogs constantly and being all consumed with reading new posts. There's just so much good content out there, I need to keep up!

But that's not a blogging addiction.

And okay I may have a thing for social media. I mean, Forgeddaboutit! (even if I don't really get how they all work and so many new ones that I can't keep up--Periscope, what? I must be old)

But that's not a blo......

Right. Okay. I do see now that blogging only amplifies these obsessions and feeds my addiction. 

Fine. 

I might have a slight problem, but they say acceptance is the first step, right?

This post is part of the monthly travel link up hosted by the lovelies  Emma, Kelly, Rebecca  and with this month's co-host Anna at Penelope and Parker. Check out their blogs and the many other link up participants. Feed your addiction.

"What are you, a tourist?"

Anyone else have ever have this situation come up?

I was visiting my neighbouring major city attending a common Canadian event when something caught my eye and I took my phone out to take a picture. Being a blogger for a couple years now, clearly my picture was being taken from "an interesting angle" versus the traditional setup. The company I was with noted my apparent odd behaviour and said, "What are you, a tourist?" I immediately was embarrassed and said a slightly defiant and very pouty "Yes".

BUT DUDE?!What's wrong with being a tourist exactly?
Do you not want to experience new things?
Meet new people?
Travel in new places?
Try new foods?
Make life more exciting?
And yes, even take a snapshot or two or one hundred to remember a moment in time you enjoyed, was thrilled by, would never do again--and reflect on the memories?

Being a tourist means opening your eyes to the world around you. Being a tourist has taught me many things about myself. Mainly it has shown me my capabilities and skills to live life more fully, not getting stuck in the mundanity of it all and to actually DO things with my free time.
Sneer at me all you like, but chances are I'm having more fun than you. If being a tourist in my homeland is wrong, I don't want to be right!

Benefits of Blogging: Link up

I started this blog when I first made the decision to move to London back in 2012. It was to be a travel blog that documented my journey and to keep in touch with my friends back home. As time marched on, the blog developed more into a personal platform where I recorded my thoughts and daily adventures; a way to connect with my parents "so father doesn't worry". And then two unexpected things happened. I began meeting new, like-minded, fellow bloggers--ironically IRL and I rediscover my love of writing.

When I first moved to London and I would be introduced to new people I would only sometimes bring up the fact that I blogged (never that I was actually a blogger), and even then, only if the conversation lead that way, would I sheepishly mention it. God forbid people knew about it. The turning point came when I met Selena and in her found a motiblogger tm (I know, it doesn't really work--how about blogspiration tm?) and my circle of friends widened. Next came #LDNBloggersTea and I was introduced to a whole group of inspiriting, creative, supportive bloggers and I was proud to say I was one too.

I used to really fancy writing, but since the last day of high school's writer's craft class, I hadn't really put pen to paper creatively, in a very long time. Sure I wrote essays, abstracts, biographies, and even a dissertation, in the ensuing years, but those were more blood to paper than an artistic expression. Blogging has brought me back to what I used to love and in a way that feels (mostly) free, informal, and most importantly, fun.

I think it's these two reasons that keep me blogging, this is my constant in my current unsettled life.
...............................
This post is part of the monthly link up hosted by Emma, Rebecca, and Kelly. Check out their posts and the others that participated in this month's travel link up.

Birthday

Today is my birthday. 

It's no big deal, no big plans, but I am turning 32.

I remember when I first started planning my move to England, I was 29 years old and knew that I would be returning to Canada when I was 31 (because maths), but that seemed so far away. I left just before my 30th birthday since everyone knows you're allowed to do crazy, irresponsible, risky things when your in your 20's. It's expected of you. Once you are 30 though, you must hunker down and start adulting all over the place. At least that was my theory. 

Now the 2 years have past and I'm turning 32!

It never actually occurred to past me that future me would actually become present me. You know? I mean, obviously I knew it would happen, but I didn't actually sit down and link it together in my head.

On my 30th birthday, I had been staying in Cambridge with a good friend of mine and she had to convince me to make some plans for the occasion. I called in my friends from London, invited along some acquaintances, and a few others I didn't even know. It was a brilliant night out on the Cambridge town.

Public loo selfie on my 30th

The following year, I knew could not compete with my 1st anniversary of turning 29, so instead I had a quiet dinner out with my little super guy at a fab location up high in the sky.

fancy dinner at the Heron Tower

  Any excuse for a new dress, amiright ladies?

The birthdays I've had abroad, have been some of my most memorable ones. I got a lot of things going on in my head right now and getting another year older has been added to the list. When looking forward becomes overwhelming, it's okay to sometimes take a peek back and remember where you've been. 

Emotionally Hungover and Jet Lagged

I've been kind of quite on the "Out and About" front these days as I spent my last few days in England travelling, packing, and saying several emotional 'so long for now's. I'm still processing my thoughts and feelings about my past 2 years and being shipped back to Canada, which I may or may not one day express here. I think I might still be in a bit of denial that this isn't just a visit. I'll probably have to prepare for an emotional breakdown in the few weeks to come, but until then I will keep myself distracted with the few remaining London posts I have lined up. 

With the move back, Erin Out and About will be getting a bit of an update and maybe a refocus as I'm no longer 'a Canadian living abroad'. I don't really know what this new direction might look like just yet, but I hope you are willing to stick around with me to see where things lead. I have meet and interacted with so many great people through this weird and wonderful blogging community and I thank you, who visit my pages, for coming along and indulging me in your interest in my mediocre iPhone photos, my blathering, and my poor attempts at puns. 

Now lets dance!

Via

On this day...

On this day two years ago I started this blog. I was preparing to make the big move to London and I wanted somewhere to record my journey and if I failed at this adventure and was forced to return home penniless and sooner than I intended then I was at least going to have something to show for my bravery of quitting a job, packing up my life, and saying 'see you soon' to my pup.

Two years since I started on this adventure and looking back, I don't think I would change a thing. My life isn't as glamorous as I might have imagined it to be, but it's certainly better than I could have hoped for.

Whatever happens in the next 7 months with my remaining time here, I do intend to fill it with love, laughter, travel and friends. And documenting as much of it as possible.

Now for the traditional weird gif after a real moment here on {erin out and about} 
Twerk it.

Confessions of a Blogger

I was tagged by Bonnie from A Compass Rose and Gina from Sweet Serenity on the Confessions of a Blogger post that has been going around the blogosphere. 

You can join in too, the rules are simple; answer the nine provided confessions, including the one written by the person who tagged you and come up with a tenth to answer.  

1. When did you first start blogging and why? 
March 26, 2012. I had finally made the decision to move to London and developed a love for blogs about moving/living abroad. I first started this blog as a creative outlet in case the big move turned out to be a 'failure' and I'd have at least a little something to show for my time here.  It's turned into so much more.

2. Have you had any past online presence?
I'm in love with social media and love getting into the new things out there--except twitter, I never got into twitter (am I the only one?)--I had started a tumblr the year before called 'I heart tea', it's mostly full of pictures and reblogs of food, clothes, gif s of dogs and tea.

3. When did you become serious about your blog?
When will I become serious about my blog more like. I'm still just doing this purely for my enjoyment, if others happen to come along and take some glee out of what I create than all the better.

4. What was your first blog post. 
My first blog post was an introduction to my intentions of what I aspired this blog to be. It's funny how you plan things to be one way and how they usually, naturally go into a different direction.  Be open to the flow.

5. What have been your biggest challenges blogging. 
All the techie stuff. I'm not that good with programming or web design and when I've managed to add or change something with the look of my blog and not ruin the whole thing, it's been a good day. There's so much more I'd like to do with it, I'll get there one day...
I also do struggle with the balance of how much happy to present, life isn't always roses and candy, but I don't like to dwell on the negative. Realistic? Not at all, but it's what I'm comfortable with for now.

6. What is the most rewarding thing about blogging? 
Making connections with people is probably the most rewarding thing about blogging for me. I love when I have a new comment to a post and I get to interact with people with similar interests. I enjoy sharing the things I see around me and love when people tell me how it reminds them about their own travels and experiences.

7. What is the most discouraging thing about blogging?

It's sometime discouraging when the inspiration to write just isn't there. I could have viewed the most beautiful location and met the most interesting of people, but sometimes the words just don't want to come and I'm left with using the words, "It was nice" over and over.
Also discouraging is that this hasn't magically provided me with income to live off so that I could continue to live in England without the pesky expiration date of a work visa (11 more months *single tear*). 

8. What is your lasting inspiration or motivation?
People keep saying to me, "You're doing things," meaning I'm not stuck in a rut going to work, coming home, making food and going to bed, I'm out there enjoying what's on offer. I want to remember all the things I've been doing and blogging is a great way to journal my time spent. I know if I was back in Canada I wouldn't be "doing things", or at least not nearly as much and I find my inspiration and motivation in making the most of my time here in England. Hopefully, "doing things" will become a habit I keep back on Canadian soil.

9. What is your current goal as a blogger? (asked by Bonnie)

Originally, I think my goal was to have more than just my parents as followers and although I am slowly but surely making my internet presence known, I'm not so concerned with this anymore. My goal is to stay true to myself and to document my time here because I'm having fun and not just for the sake of it because it would make a good post.

I am tagging some of the lovely people I met at the Blogger afternoon tea:

Melanie from Melanie Fontaine

Mandy from Emm in London

Sarah from The Wanderblogger

Tina from Girl Meets Globe

Jacintha from Urban Pixxels

Anna from Eat, See, Do 

Jaklien from Passport and Toothbrush

Samantha from To the Days Like This

My question for them is...

10. What is 'off limits' when blogging? My answer: When I started this blog I wanted it to be travel focused so avoided discussing things like recipes, ootd, or anything non travely. Today, I think is a different story and I'm exploring new areas of discussion that were previously 'off limits'.

Whether you were tagged by me or not, feel free to join in and provide a link in the comment section.

Fun travels!

Cheers, Madame! Link Up

Today I'm linking up with Oh, the places we will go! and Créatrice Mondial  with their 'Cheers, Madame' series they've been running for the last few weeks. 

I have visited both cities; Paris in December during the magical Christmas season and London for the first time in 2004 part of my semester abroad program.  Paris was lovely and amazing and checked all the boxes I was expecting it to on my first visit there, but it's just no London. 
I didn't know in 2004 just what to expect from London, but I certainly didn't expect to fall in love with this city so completely and feel it's pull on me every time I returned to Canada. I don't think London is the type of city that you can feel indifferent about, you either love it or hate it. Here a some of the reasons why I truly love London...

1. Greenspaces

Walking around the city you often and easily come across public parks and squares where I've often enjoyed a sunny afternoon sitting in a deck chair or on the grass enjoying a good book or a picnic.

2. Blue plaques

The history is everywhere you look in London, sometimes you don't even have to look very hard to spot a blue plaque on the side of a building informing you of the famous former resident.  Other times the history is a little more hidden in the surrounding environment or the scars of buildings. 

via

3. The tube 

Many may disagree with me on the greatness of the tube, but I think it's a fantastic beast that gets me anywhere I want to go within the city.  Toronto does not compare when it comes to the underground system. I feel a sense of freedom and independence when I wiz* around the city with relative ease.

*depending on the day

image via

4. Walkability 

When I'm not on the tube I'm on my feet walking the city. It's the best way to see the world and how else could you happen upon a street fete, a hole in the wall cafe, or a horse* standing on an apartment balcony near Harrods--all of which have happened to me.

*Yes, a real live horse!

5. Pub culture

Finished work? Head to the pub. Looking for Sunday lunch? Head to the pub. Looking to test your trivia knowledge? Head to the pub. A good pub has a warm atmosphere, a bit of history, and a great selection of drink and London has these in spades.

6. Museums

I <3 a museum and I <3 a bargain. Here national museums are free and you can't throw a stone without hitting a museum of some sort. 

7. 'Marketing'

I love visiting the many markets of London and am continually discovering new favourite markets that I want to visit again and again.

8. The Thames

I enjoy being so close to water, being able to hear the waves on a windy day, the smell of the salt water, and seeing passing boats and ships. I spend a lot of time in the east end of London where I often enjoy the history and culture of the docklands and running along the canals. 

9. Food

I know Britons are not known for their gastronomy but really you can find any kind of food in London. All the different food festivals that take place here, you can't want for anything over the course of a year. If I was wealthy I'd spend all my time in restaurants, cafes, delis, food trucks etc. (any spare time I had would probably have to be spent at the gym). 

10. Expats

I've made a great group of friends here and a large part of that is due to fellow expats. This group although very transient are a ready made group of friends who share similar values and who understand your occasional homesickness.

image via

Fun travels!

Just of bit of rambling

In every relationship there comes a time when you have to decide if this relationship is going someplace and if you even want it to be going there and the other day I found myself in this very same scenario (weird, right?). We decided that rather than just hang on for the sake of it, we should end things and just be friends (I so badly want to use quotations around that). 
The initial comedown from a relationship, no matter how casual and how amicable the parting, is always a hard one. I'm forcing myself not to pick up the phone and send a quick text because I'm bored (OH SO BORED). I realize now that almost every spare evening I had I spent with him, I must get used to being on my own and coping with my moments of boredom (GOOD LORD THE BOREDOM). 
Then I realized there is no better time for me to be single than while living an expat life in London. I meet new people each week and London has a lot on offer. I just need to get back to being comfortable with myself again and London will be shiny and exciting to me once more.

Enough rambling from me, thanks for sticking around. As your reward, here is a dog enjoying his bone.

Fun travels!

Liebster Award

The Liebster award is given to up and coming bloggers who have less than 200 followers.  What is a Liebster?  The meaning: Liebster is German and means sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome. The Liebster Award is a way for bloggers to show their love to other bloggers and also a great way to discover new blogs.

The rules are that you tell 11 random facts about yourself and answer the 11 questions from the blogger who nominated you.  Then you nominate some blogs and give them 11 new questions to answer.  And you pass on the love.  I was nominated by the sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome friend Selena of Oh, the places we will go! 

11 random facts about me:

1. I hate potatoes. Especially the ones that taste most like potatoes.

2. I melt for men with dimples.

3. I'm a big ol' history nerd

4. My left foot is bigger than my right

5. I cannot whistle. I've been taught many times and just don't get it.

6. I am a published poet. No big deal.

7. I once tried to eat something off my bedroom floor thinking it was edible. It was not. It was lint (not the chocolate)

8. I just giggled out loud at remembering the time I tried to eat something off my bedroom floor thinking it was edible and it was not.

9. I used to wish I was a twin. (Still kinda do)

10. I seriously heart Archie Comics.

11. I have a dog named Betty.

Random enough?

1.  What is one challenge you have set yourself this year? 

The challenge I set myself this year was a carry over from last year when I first moved to London. It's to live the the fullest each day I can spend here in my lovely London (or at least as much as my budget will allow). I don't know what the future holds and I don't know how long I will be able to stay here so I'm making the most of my time.

2.  What is something you enjoyed in childhood that you would like to do as an adult?

I used to horseback ride. I didn't do it for very long, but I took to it like a duck to water...or a fly to a horse. I went from being afraid of them when I was little to not being able to get enough of them. I once did a 4 hour trail ride in Wales, walked like an old lady for a week afterwards, but totally worth it.

3.  Do you prefer to read, write or watch?

Definitely write and watch. I always intend to read more, but I'm easily distracted by shiny...

4.  Do you participate in any volunteer programs for your community?

Currently, I'm a new volunteer with the learning team at Somerset House. If you haven't heard of it, Google it. They have some great activities going on all the time.

5.  What are some of your favorite sayings?

I quote a lot of pop culture. Good and bad, whether I know people will get it or not. It's all about entertaining me. 

6.  What movies could you watch over and over again and still love?

French Kiss. Love Actually. Mannequin. BOOM! (that's just a sound effect, not a movie) 

7.  Describe one of your life goals.

To see the Northern Lights. Being Canadian, this is something that is actually quite achievable and yet I still haven't done it. One day.

8.  When do you feel your happiest? 

When out with friends enjoying a good meal. I like being surrounded by people who get me and can make my laugh til my cheeks hurt.

9.  What's the one thing you can't leave the house without and why?

A bottle of water. You always need to keep hydrated. And with the medical cabinet I tote around with me, I need someway to wash down those pills. Yay for sudden headaches and lactose intolerance! 

10.  If I gave you £1,000 right now, what would you do with it?

Go on a shopping spree. I've been on such a budget diet since I moved to the UK that mama needs a new pair of shoes!

11.  Where would you want your dream house to be?
I still haven't figured this one out. I'll let you know as soon as I do.

Well that was fun! But here comes the tricky part. I don't know of 11 bloggers that follow me to tag them here. So why don't we do this; 
I nominate [insert name here] from [insert blog here] to complete the 11 questions above.

Please let me know in the comments if you do it, I would love to read it and get to know you a little better!


Fun travels!